Most parents are filled with self-contradicting irony, at one end, you parade your child milestones wherever and whenever you can, you never fail to mention how those insignificant details of your child daily routine is the foundation to being CEO of the next big tech company, the next Mozart, the next Van Gogh or even the next Beckham. But on the other extreme end, you want the kid to be docile, filial, God-fearing and law-abiding citizen. Now, anyone want to ask how much weed did Steve Job smoke? Or how many chic did Ronaldo bedded/bedding in his life? Why don’t we ask many tax rules are those Forbes top 50 companies breaking on a daily basis?
History will show that there are only few that achieved worldly recognition, fame and fortunes while remained a saint, there is Jesus, Buddha, Mother Teresa, some of the Popes, Prophet Muhammad… I think that is the end of the list. So what was your actual intention when you teach your 2-year-old kid how to walk but when he runs, you scream in absolute horror. Parents are indeed very confused homosapiens.
Malaysia Growing up
There was a time when I was constantly asked to draw the image of Malaysia in the year 2020, write how we would be living in The Jetson like houses, and if you suggest anything short of a magnetic elevated transportation device, you will get a big red F on your work. Basically, you asked the entire generation of children to dream, to envision the future, to be bold and dare to be different. So, we are here now, about half a decade before the midnight bell strikes on 2020, suddenly you don’t like what you see, and you start to have cold feet, knee-jerk reaction, screaming in horror.
Is this due to fact we are not living up to your dreams, or you didn’t foresee our dreams are nothing close to flying spaceships and intergalactic travel? Instead we are tree-huggers, coffee lovers, Instagrames, Facebookers, speaks the language of hashtags, heck we even stop a country with yellow umbrellas. Are we being a petulant child or are you being an obsessive controlling parent?
- We refuse to follow textbook rules, because you asked us to think outside the box.
- We don’t want to be spoon fed, because you asked us to learn from the world best.
- We don’t need you to deforest Borneo, because we are reading from iPads.
- We don’t think you should subsidise petrol, because e-car is an available technology.
- We don’t do open house, because we now know how to eat less, live more.
- We don’t watch RTM or TV3, because we get content from Youtube and Netflix.
- We don’t like campaign poster to educate us what is right or wrong, because we can Wiki it.
And the list goes on… Perhaps from your point of view, things are growing out of control, but on the flip side, you should be proud parents that we grew up to be wiser, learned and know how to think for ourselves and the next generation as well? No?
Learning to Let It Go
I hate that song to the bones but I have to agree that we all have to learn to let go as a parent, understanding parenting is not a lease on the of your child, but a guiding line to a kite. And only when the line snaps, the kite will truly fly to its full potential. As parents, we just need to know where to pick them up when they fall to the ground.
Similarly, a country should not be defined by a leader or a political party, instead, the true strength lies within the soul and spirit of each citizen. The success of a generation isn’t defined by mega-structures but what are the resonating impact from our doings. We can’t expect a child to follow our orders forever, nor should we think we are going to be there for them for eternity. Let it go so we can let them grow.
Easier said than done, ask Dr M.